Publication Day - It's exciting, reflective, frightening - all those things

In April of 2014, I was "discovered" by Amazon and they re-published my historical novel, Three Daughters.  Since November of that year, the book has sold over 200,000 copies and received 2300 reviews, the majority of them five stars. (Although one woman said it was the best book she had ever read and gave it one star.  I wonder if she was being sarcastic or just thought one star was the best.) The book was originally published by Delacorte Press almost twenty years ago.  Amazon resurrected this 700 page saga and made it a bestseller.  How lucky am I?  I am grateful to the brilliant Jeff Bezos for giving writers a friendly and welcoming outlet for their books.  I am particularly grateful to my editor, Jodi Warshaw, who found me, the needle, in the huge haystack that is Amazon.

Imagine, if you can, me in a mid afternoon sugar fog, trying to decipher that initial e-mail from Amazon with the subject line: Interest in Daughters.  As I've written before, I thought someone wanted to marry my daughter.  I thought, how sweet, they are asking for her hand in an e-mail.

Early last year, I sold Amazon a new novel, Fortune's Daughters.   Again Jodi Warshaw held my hand through an arduous editing process and the outcome is being published today.  When I post in this blog, I try to offer up humor and silliness, but I can't think of anything funny today.

I know many of you have pre-purchased Fortune's Daughters and will receive it today.  Please consider leaving a short review on the Amazon site.  The review can be as simple as:  I enjoyed this book.   Reviews are the lifeblood of all books and I need your help.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQ4TH78

Thank you to so many of my e-friends: both Carolyns, Diane, Carlaray, Mark Williams, Peggy Muller, Carol, Rod Sharp, Jeff, Sandra, Sandy, both Mollys, Michael, Susannah, Amanda Brett (we go way back), Maria, Denise, Sherry, Elizabeth (the faithful), Ruth, Paula, Meredith, Amy, Carol O., Andy, MamaRobot, Alexandra, Carin, Cheryl, Charles, Barbara S. Sandra T, Nicco, Anne, JoBeth, Kacy, Lisa Y., Neva, L.C Evans (dearest friend), C. J, Pamela, Kathleen (admiration), Chris, Mel, Linda P., Charlotte, Dona (copywriting roomie), Jane, Liz,  among many, many others.

So What?

Sometimes I write a blog and I’m afraid to publish it. Okay every time I write a blog I’m afraid to publish it. Someone recently freaked me out by saying, “It’s not the book you wrote, it’s the book the reader reads.” Oh! When you publish, you’re inviting someone to look inside your head and take apart your psyche. When you make writing public, you’re putting on a bathing suit on the first warm day of summer and asking an indifferent audience to assess what happened to your body over the winter. I’ve been putting my writing out there for over thirty years and I’m still afraid of making a fool of myself. Many times I will hit “publish” and then click on the “edit” pencil so the words will revert to me for safekeeping. I rearrange a line or two and put it out there again. Then I take it off and then put it on.

What am I afraid of? Let’s say someone reads a blog and thinks. “I didn’t understand one sentence of that blog.” Or “Wow that was a lot of whining for nothing.” Or “At least no trees were cut down to put that drivel out there.” Here’s where I should drag out my “So What?” card. I made my “So What?” card about two years ago when one of my friends was confronted with a serious problem. It may sound callous but it is a good ploy for focusing attention on exactly what we think the outcome might be to any dilemma. When something bad happens and I pose the question “So what” I’m forced to verbalize the shadowy fears that bunch together in one big tangled ball of anxiety. So what if no one likes it? I say to myself. They’re not going to come here and kill me. I’ll ride it out. Friends might be delighted that you made a fool of yourself. You’ll make them happy. When I hit “publish” I imagine all the subscribers have stopped what they are doing and even though they live in separate parts of the world, they have come together to point and cluck in dismay over the infantile choices I’ve made.
The “So What” solution however is built to counter. “Even if that’s true, eventually people will forget and go on with life. Who thinks about Tiger Woods these days?
Often, when the blog is disseminated to subscribers, I will receive an e-mail that says: “This made my day. I laughed so hard and its only 8:30.” When that happens I go back to the blog to see what I’ve written that is funny. I don’t know when I’m being funny. I try to write about the ironies and craziness in this world but I can’t be sure any normal person shares my reactions.
I love writing the blog. My big dream in writing was to have a column and write about everyday things. My blog is like a column except there is no editor to save me