Friday, June 13, 2014

Yes, dust mites poop, too.

I wish I could interest Apple in doing something about dust.   Dust is the last frontier to be conquered but it lives under the radar.  Apple could call it idust and immediately it would gain attention and status.  

The problem with dust is that it is relentless, ubiquitous, universal, insolent, an equal opportunity pest.  The folks over at SC Johnson want us to believe lemon-scented Pledge is the answer (a double insult one for the fake lemon smell and the other for the idea that you should smear a sticky mist over an already horrid, stale bunch of debris). 

What is dust?  It's everything that comes off of you and off of your pets and off of the ground and off of all the fabrics in your house and whatever is pooped out by bugs and mites.  Yes, mites poop, too.
What's up?

I feel if Apple took dust over for me, it would tame it, contain it, put it in a well-designed case and finally make it so precious it would all be transported to the Apple warehouse.  Oh, god, yes.  Apple might even make dust talk to me, like Siri on iphone.  As I'm lying in bed I could whisper in the silence, "Hey, dust, are you still there, under this bed?"
I am.
Will you ever go away.
No.
I think about you every day.
That's sweet.
It's because you make me cough and sneeze.
Yeah.  I know.
But you have no purpose.
I teach you to endure.

2 comments:

  1. I read the other day that by the time your mattress is 7 years old, it's weight has doubled because of just such abominations as dust mite poo and old skin cells. Haven't been able to sleep since.

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